The 7 Habits of Highly Stoic People
You can spot a Stoic from a mile away.
How? Well, they just act differently than other people. They tend to be the strong, silent type. They don’t get worked up over things as easily as other people do. They keep their cool when others are panicking. They generally tend to be happy people who are content with their lives.
But mostly, you can spot them because they follow 7 distinct habits that distinguish them as Stoics. Once you know their habits, Stoics stick out like a sore thumb.
The 7 Habits of Highly Stoic People…
1 – They don’t worry about things they have no control over.
“Of things some are in our power, and others are not.” ~ Epictetus
Non-Stoics get upset all the time over things they can’t control. The Weather, politics, what others think of them; all things they waste their precious time and mental energy fretting over.
A Stoic knows it is silly to waste their time worrying about things they cannot control. They put things that happen to them into one of two buckets: What they can control, and what they cannot control. They act on the things they can control. They accept the things they cannot control.
2 – They don’t allow themselves to be taken by surprise.
“When you wake up in the morning, tell yourself: the people I deal with today will be meddling, ungrateful, arrogant, dishonest, jealous and surly.” ~ Marcus Aurelius
People who don’t practice Stoicism get easily surprised. Especially by the behavior of others. “I can’t believe they did that!” is something you will frequently hear from the non-Stoic.
But a Stoic prepares themselves for the bad behavior of others. Why? Because they know that it is natural for people to behave badly. That is what people do, all the time, every single day. And Stoics never allow themselves to get upset over things that occur frequently and naturally.
3 – They remain calm in the face of chaos.
“To be like the rock that waves keep crashing over. It stands unmoved and the raging of the sea falls still around it.” ~ Marcus Aurelius
Someone who isn’t a Stoic will panic when things go wrong. Things tend to catch them off guard. When things don’t go according to plan, they get confused, lost. Unsure how to respond to unforeseen circumstances.
But a Stoic remains calm when things go sideways. They know that getting upset will not do anything to help a bad situation. So they remain at ease, accept things as they are, and get to work on a solution.
4 – They are happy with what they have.
“It is not the man who has too little who is poor, but the one who hankers after more.” ~ Seneca
Non-Stoics are always busy, chasing more, more, more (more money, more possessions, more attention). They think that they will be happy if they get that next possession or achievement. Then they get it, realize they are still unhappy, and chase the next thing. A vicious cycle of chasing but never catching.
The Stoic stands out by standing still. They don’t chase after possessions. You will not see them driving in a fancy car or wearing the latest fashions. They keep it simple. Simple car, simple clothes, simple lifestyle. They realize that they already have everything that truly matters. They know that when you are happy with what you have, you never need more than what you have.
5 – They accept everything that happens.
“Seek not that the things which happen should happen as you wish; but wish the things which happen to be as they are, and you will have a tranquil flow of life.” ~ Epictetus
People who don’t practice Stoicism are always upset with their current situation. They think the weather is too hot, or too cold. They get upset when traffic is moving too slow. Or when the store is out of something they wanted to buy. Every small first-world problem turns into a crisis that they feel sorry for themselves over.
The Stoic, on the other hand, accepts things exactly as they are. They know there is no possible way things could be different than they are at this very moment. Why get upset over it? The weather is what the weather is. The traffic is moving the way it is moving. They put their focus on how they can influence the future and accept the present moment, just as it is.
6 – They listen more than they speak.
“Practice really hearing what people say. Do your best to get inside their minds.” ~ Marcus Aurelius
Most people talk more than they listen. In a conversation, they will be the ones talking over the other person. Or they are bursting at the seems waiting for the next nanosecond pause to blurt out what they have to say. Or they simply dominate the conversation, never giving their conversation partner a chance to speak.
But Stoics hold conversations differently. They are the quiet one who listens intently. They give the other person space to speak. They know that by speaking they will not learn anything new, they can only learn by listening.
7 – They do not fear death.
“What is the harm in returning to the point whence you came? He will live poorly who does not know how to die well.” ~ Seneca
The typical person fears death. They don’t want to talk about it. They don’t want to think about it. The specter of their own death hangs over them and they refuse to face the fact they will die.
But a Stoic actually thinks about their own death…often. They take time to reflect upon their mortality and the fact that they will one day die. It sounds depressing, but actually, it is inspiring. Stoics know that reflecting on their own death helps them to appreciate their life that much more.
Now that you know the 7 Habits of Highly Stoic People, you too can easily spot a Stoic.
If you practice them, you will become one.
