The Philosophy of “The Other”
People are fascinating.
The more people I connect with, the better my life is. Some of my best days are when I meet someone new. Or the days I form a friendship over coffee or a Zoom meeting. The very best days are the ones where I am able to help someone else.
Human connection fills me with positive energy. So I seek it out. To maximize my engagement with other people, I created my own “Philosophy of The Other.”
My Philosophy of the Other is a set of practices that keeps my focus on connecting with and helping people. A system that sets my attention less on myself and more on others.
I was inspired to create my Philosophy of The Other by investor, author, and educator Adam Robinson. Adam frequently speaks of the joy he gets from engaging with others.
I took some of his thoughts, along with concepts I learned from others, and mixed them up to create my own philosophy of human connection.
Here are the components of my personal “Philosophy of the Other”, along with who they were inspired by:
Delight People — Look for ways in my interactions with people to bring them happiness and delight. Inspired by Adam Robinson.
Lean into Each Personal Interaction — Go into every connection I make with another person expecting magic. Inspired by Adam Robinson.
Go First! — Always be the first to say hello, make eye contact, speak to someone, shake someone’s hand. Inspired by Gabby Reece.
Lagniappe — Do a little more than is expected; go the extra mile for others. Inspired by Michael Pitcher.
Help This Person — Every time you encounter another person, think: help this person. Nothing else can so quickly supercharge your career and improve the quality of your life. Inspired by Bruce Kasanoff.
Loving Kindness — Throughout the course of the day send thoughts and wishes of happiness to random people I cross paths with. Inspired by Chade-Meng Tan.
Canvas Strategy — Imagine if for every person you met, you thought of some way to help them, something you could do for them. And you looked at it in a way that entirely benefited them and not you. Inspired by Ryan Holiday.
Servant Leadership — Focus primarily on the growth and well-being of people and the communities to which I belong. Put the needs of others first and help people develop and perform as highly as possible. Inspired by James C. Hunter.
How To Create Your Own Philosophy of “The Other”
- Build Your Own Philosophy – The beautiful thing about a Philosophy of The Other is that it is completely customizable. You can borrow bits and pieces from anything that inspires you to connect with others. Mix in some of your own thoughts and practices too. Building you own philosophy of engagement sets your personal standard of how you want to connect with and bring value to others.
- It’s Not About Being an Extrovert – I am a natural introvert, and I embrace it. The Philosophy of the Other is not about forcing myself to being more extroverted. It is about connecting with people on my own terms. It helps balance things and keeps me from drifting too far to the introvert end of the spectrum. When my natural tendency to stay quiet arises, I tell myself “Go First”… and I say “hi”, or introduce myself.
- Be Intentional – It’s not enough just to build your Philosophy of The Other, you have to live it. You have to intentionally seek out opportunities to practice it. You have to carry it with you into every interaction you have. Making magic means you have to bring positive energy. Delighting people takes extra effort. Helping people requires us to put our selfishness aside. It’s a commitment.
The more you interact with others, the more interesting your life becomes. The more you help others, the more valuable your life becomes.
Develop your own Philosophy of “The Other” to help you do both.
